How NOT to Be Consumed with Queenly Disappointment

- February 02, 2016

It happens. You are standing there in the spotlight. Grasping tightly the hand of the other girl. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting for the emcee to puh-lease announce the first runner up. Because you know…if your name is not announced, then YOU are the newly crowned queen of the pageant! Then, it happens. You hear YOUR name. Sudden disappointment engulfs your whole being. From the follicle of the hairs on your head to the tips of your beautifully sculptured toenails. “Nooooooo! My name was not to be called!” you scream silently in your head. All the work you’ve done. All the time you’ve put in. All the emotion spent getting to that moment on stage….and it wasn’t meant to be.

Well, I have wonderful news for you, my sister – all is not lost!

Actually, NOTHING at all was lost, but a whole lot gained. Take a look at the journey you traveled getting to that point. Look at the growth in many areas of your life that you went through. There are a few pearls of wisdom I am sure you gleaned along the way. Without traveling this journey you wouldn’t be stronger, smarter, wiser, and more beautiful, than had you not taken this voyage. Even standing on that stage, under that glaring spotlight, and not winning the crown is all part of this beautiful journey. Your life has meaning and purpose. At that moment in time, it wasn’t your crown to win. You put in the work. You put in the time. You put in the blood, sweat, and tears to get to that spotlight. That moment, that exact moment and situation, was precisely where you were supposed to be. Nowhere else. No other situation. And, in the heels of no other queen.

The beauty of the journey is personal growth. To grow in wisdom, character, inside beauty, and to learn that your journey is not all about you. Your journey is about using what you learn to share with others. And, disappointment is part of that journey; learning how to handle disappointment with grace and confidence. Yes, it takes confidence to lose. Knowing that it was not personal…it just was not meant to be. And, that is okay. As long as you know you did your very best, and that your very best is honoring to yourself, your family, your friends, your fellow competitors, the pageant system and its director; then, you can stand in that spotlight with your head held high. Knowing that you ARE a winner because you took the journey, and you came out a better person than when you began. That, more than a crown, will last forever. A crown will tarnish. But, what you learn and embrace along your journey…will last forever; and, make an impact on the hearts of others. Besides, isn’t that why you embarked on your journey of pageantry? To make a difference in this world? And, winning a crown is not the only way to make a difference, is it?

Remember…

“It’s not about the crown, it’s about the journey.”

~Spruce Dickerson